So I realized today that if I decide to have peanut butter on a spoon right out of the jar that I cannot stop with just one spoonful. Even if I close the jar back up, I open it and have more every time. It is the same with chips and salsa, whatever is put out, I am pretty much guaranteed to finish it. But then I can go days and days without thinking of peanut butter at all.
And now that I am thinking about it, I have been that way in relationships. If I hone in on somebody, if I decide that I want to be on their radar, then I go too hard. I give up too much to 'make them want/like me'. I want them to need me, and then if they openly tell me that they do need me, I feel put out. Overwhelmed and irritated by the 'need'.
OR, I twist and bend myself into a pretzel to be the person I think they want me to be. Then after a time I despise them for not seeing the real me. Whoever that is...
Thoughts to ponder, eh?
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